A dichotomy is a division or separation of something into two distinct parts, ideas, or perspectives. It is often used to describe a situation where there are two opposing viewpoints or approaches that are seen as mutually exclusive. Dichotomies can be useful for understanding complex issues and making decisions, but they can also be limiting if they oversimplify the complexity of a situation.
This note is about bringing awareness of the dichotomies we find in our careers, and how by getting feedback from others we could find the balance we need to grow.
My journey
Reflecting on my own career growth, I found several dichotomies such as listening vs speaking, focus on problems vs focusing on solutions, short term vs long term thinking, etc. I realized that at times I tend to focus on one over the other, for example: listening, focus on programs, having long term thinking, etc. However, this often oversimplifies complex situations that in some cases require me to do more speaking, focusing on solutions or thinking in the short term.
My first realization was when I think I became too "problem focused". I wrote notes and posts that talked about how important it was to focus on problems, not impact, how to articulate problems, and how the most effective teams spend 80% of their time understanding problems. However, I received feedback from peers and leaders who insisted that sometimes attempting solutions was also necessary to move forward
Similarly, at some point in my career I also started focusing on listening over speaking, thinking that it was important for me to spend time understanding what others need to say over what I had to say. There is no denying that active listening is a very important skill to practice, however, I also received feedback from my peers that sometimes is not enough to listen: we also need to speak and provide value to the other person or the group
Another example was when I was advised to have more "long term thinking". Again, I believe that it's very important to develop the strategic skills of having long term thinking but it does not mean that I should always think about our long term goals. When I started over-indexing on long term thinking, I received feedback from my leaders that I should probably spend 30% of my time on long term planning and 70% of my time on short term goals and execution
Being open to feedback gave me clarity on where I was over-indexing. Finding the right balance depended on the situation and where I was on my journey, and this proved to be really useful.
Why should you strive to find this balance?
At any point in our careers we have gaps that we need to fill in order to advance to the next level. Many of the ‘staff’ behaviors talk about long term thinking, reframing problems and collaboration, while at the same time our leaders expect us to take extreme ownership while delegating, being proactive while reacting to changes, speaking with confidence while conveying humility. Many of these skills can be mutually exclusive at one given point, but getting feedback from peers gives us the opportunity to see which area needs more work.
I started this note with a thought that often pops into my head when I am feeling stressed at work: "Why do I care so much?". I remember the book titled: "The subtle art of not giving a f***" which brings me back to where I may be caring (or obsessing) too much. I realized that caring too much can also feel overwhelming and distracting, while at the same time it is important to care enough to drive change and make an impact. This is a difficult balance for me at times.
Other examples of dichotomies at work
Here are some of the most common career-related dichotomies that I found
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Ownership vs. Delegation: taking full responsibility for tasks while knowing when to delegate to others for efficiency and team development.
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Urgent vs. Important: managing urgent tasks that demand immediate attention while prioritizing important tasks that contribute to long-term success.
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Focus vs. Flexibility: maintaining deep concentration on a single task versus staying flexible and managing multiple priorities or shifting contexts.
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Confidence vs. Humility: being confident in your skills and decisions while remaining humble enough to accept feedback, learn from others, and admit mistakes.
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Independence vs. Collaboration: working independently to demonstrate initiative and self-reliance, while also collaborating effectively to leverage diverse perspectives and skills.
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Strengths vs. Weaknesses: the balance between playing to your strengths to achieve excellence, while addressing weaknesses that are critical to your success or could pose significant barriers.
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Proactivity vs. Reactivity: being proactive where you can plan and prepare for the future, while also maintaining the agility and responsiveness to react effectively to unforeseen circumstances.
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Stability vs. Innovation: sticking with proven methods and systems for reliability while also embracing innovation and change to foster growth and adaptability
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Risk-Taking vs. Caution: taking risks that could lead to big rewards while managing caution to avoid unnecessary failures or setbacks.
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Specialization vs. Generalization: focusing on a specific area of expertise to achieve mastery while gaining broad knowledge and skills across multiple disciplines
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Caring vs. Detachment: caring enough to drive change and make an impact, but not so much that you become overwhelmed or distracted.
Balance is very personal. Balance is going from where you are to where you want to be. Balance is a moving target.
Recommend reading: Dichotomy of Leadership by Jocko Willink and Leif Babin